One more time. This compilation of political positions and comments is that of guest milblogger The Crawfish. He alone is responsible for it’s content. The management and staff of vajoe, the advertisers, the voters in tonight’s Texas, Ohio, Vermont, and Rhode Island primaries, the people stuck in airports around the country because of weather delays, the fans of the English Premier League and the Champions League, and all of my former dart shooting teammates have nothing to do with the content, and would probably call me nuts anyway. Then again, I can appreciate that term, since it is the most famous quote from a Brigadier General during all of WW2: To the German Commander, NUTS!, signed, the American Commander. God Bless the memory of Anthony MacAuliffe and the Battling Bastards of Bastogne.
In case you’re new to this three-part series, the management of The Swamp has decided that the GOP, in general, and John McCain, in particular, have kicked the conservative base to the curb. The Crawfish, since he’s still on active duty for another 24 months, cannot run for the Presidency, but he and the management have come up with their own party and platform, in theory at least. It is called The Crawfish Party Platform, but some folks have complained about the party name. Hey, when we can really make a run for it, we’ll give it a better name.
Topics in our Party Platform include (in no particular order):National Defense
10th Amendment Commission
Clean Bill Committment
Line Item Veto
The Fair Tax
Entitlement Programs
Foreign Aid
Glo-Bull Warming
What the First Amendment Really Says
Federal Courts and Their Jurisdictions
UnConstitutional Departments, Agencies, and Bureaucracies
Budget
End Social InSecurity Fairly
The English Language
Embryonic Stem Cell Research
Embassy Security
Border Control and Immigration
National Primary Plan
Campaign Finance Reform
Diversity and Multiculturalism
Self-reliance and Responsibility
Political Correctness
Disaster Relief
Abortion
Prisoner’s Rights
The War On Terror
Israel and the Palestinians
Energy Policy
Minimum Wage
Legal Reform
Honesty in Governmental Votes
The Second AmendmentTaking Care of Those Who Are Disabled
A Constitutional Amendment to Fix the 14th Amendment
In parts 1 & 2 of this series, we went over the first 24 planks. We proudly present the remaining 10:
Prisoner’s Rights: Prison inmates have the right to life, adequate food and water, and to not be tortured. Other than that, they have no rights. No right to cable TV and exercise. The only TV channels allowed will be C-SPAN networks, CNN, FOX News, a local weather channel, a local news channel, and a prison information channel. No right to libraries unless for education research. No right to air conditioning (if our troops overseas can stand the elements, so can inmates). If the prisoner has as much private space as a sailor on a destroyer, then there is no overcrowding. Prisoners will be expected to work for 10 hours per day for the government, and this can be anything from furniture manufacture to chain gangs along the highway. Prisoners not on death row or serving life sentences without parole will be expected to complete high school equivalence if they do not have a diploma, and work toward a trade school certificate or an Associate’s degree. While pursuing their education, their work shifts will be cut in half. No right to endless appeals over piddly stuff. If sentenced to death, they have the right to one appeal per court level. If they are convicted of a state offense, their appeals end with the state supreme courts, as does their life. If convicted of federal crimes, their appeals can go to the Supremes, but only once, and all appeals must be completed within 2 years of the original verdict. The War On Terror: This is not politically correct to state, but it is a religious war. One side admits it, but our side is afraid to admit it. Islam declared war on the rest of the world when the Prophet Mohammed commanded that all non-believers (infidels) be converted, enslaved (dhimmitude), or put to the sword. The war has been going on for over 1300 years. It will not end until the world is entirely subjected to Sharia Law or Islam is exterminated. That’s not a pretty thought, but it is the plain truth, so if you don’t like it, get over it. As for the illegal combatant prisoners at Guantanamo, they do not meet the requirements set forth in the Geneva Accords for prisoner of war status, therefore they can be tortured, held indefinitely, or even summarily executed. Sucks to be them.
Israel and the Palestinians: There were no such things as ‘Palestinians’ until the 60s. Mostly, they were arabs living in Jordan whose leadership angered the Jordanian government (Yassir Arafat escaped into exile disguised as a woman). Their ‘movement’ began when they got kicked out of Jordan. If they had been peaceful, they could have had a pretty good life in Israel, Syria, Lebanon, Jordan, or wherever they wanted to be, but no. They demanded that Israel become theirs. Our Party believes that if the Palestinians want a homeland of their own, they should negotiate for land that is currently part of some arab nation. Israel is small enough for its own self. It doesn’t need to get smaller. The arab nations have plenty of land. As for Israel’s borders, the 1968 attempt at exterminating Israel by the arab nations was a war of aggression. When you start one of those wars and lose, you don’t get back land that you got run out of. Syria lost control of the Golan Heights when Israeli forces fought back the invaders. Jordan lost the West Bank and their part of Jerusalem. Egypt lost Gaza and the Sinai Peninsula. Israel has since given Egypt the Sinai in return for peace, and because they really didn’t want it anyway. Gaza, Golan, and the West Bank are properly Israeli until such a time as Israel freely gives them away. Until then, Israel is free to do whatever they want in those areas. If they wish to set up lots of settlements, that’s their prerogative. If they wish to expel all of the ‘Palestinians’, they are free to do so. If any more rockets or missiles are fired into Israel from Gaza, the IDF should be free to wipe out all of Gaza. If the arabs don’t like it, they can take the ‘Palestinians’ in themselves. If Hezbollah strikes from Lebanon, the IDF is within its rights to turn southern Lebanon into a sheet of glass.
Energy Policy: The various left wing groups in America have completely screwed up our energy policy. They complain about pollution from electricity plants, but won’t allow power companies to build new, clean, efficient plants, especially nuclear plants. Our Party will give the green light to companies to build new power plants. They complain about not enough alternative energy sources, but won’t allow wind farms because they kill a couple of birds per year and they spoil Teddythedrunk(D-Chappaquiddick)’s view when he goes sailing. We will give the energy companies the go ahead to work on alternative energy forms and means of production. They complain about oil refineries, but won’t allow new, more efficient, cleaner ones to be built. They complain about the price of fuel, but won’t allow the refineries to be built or oil and natural gas drilling. We will open ANWR and the areas off the California and Florida coasts to drilling. We will wean ourselves off of the oil from the Middle East and Venezuela. They complain about the price of gasoline, but each state demands different gasoline formulas for summer, fall, winter, and spring. We will convene a meeting of the environmental regulatory agencies from the states to get them to agree on formulas to be used around the country, so production is simplified. They complain that government demands on the auto industry and gas mileage aren’t high enough. Our Party will say that the free market will decide what kind of cars the auto industry will produce. If consumers press for higher mileage and different fueling options, the companies will make it happen. Our Party will reject Kyoto and all follow-on enviro-nut treaties, especially if they call for the destruction of our economic base while doing nothing about other nations that pollute more, such as China and India. It’s not that we hate the environment. Our Party believes in responsible use of resources and attempting to do things ‘greener’, but we will not mandate that through the strong arm of the government.
Minimum Wage: Since there is no place in the Constitution where the federal government has the authority to have any say in the private business contracts between employer and employee, the federal minimum wage would be one of the first things axed by the 10th Amendment Commission, but only if our Party doesn’t move to kill it through the courts beforehand. This also goes for equal opportunity employment and every other government intrusion into businesses. If Billy-Bob, Jim-Bob, and Bubba, the Redneck Cousins, want to run a sporting goods, bait, and beer store somewhere in the South, and they know their clientele will be a bit on the racist and sexist side, it is their right as the business owners to hire only white Southern males to work there. The ACLU, of course, will send a black female to apply for a job and, when she’s rejected, they’ll file suit claiming discrimination. The cousins shouldn’t have to fear that kind of lawsuit, nor should they have to hire someone that would be a detriment to their business just because of some equal opportunity law.
Legal Reform: Getting rid of our litigious society will require a lot of work, but step one is real tort reform in the form of Loser Pays. If you bring forth a lawsuit, and you cause a company or person to spend thousands of dollars to defend themselves (or be forced to settle out of court because the expense of fighting the case would bankrupt them), you should be taking the risk that if you are in the wrong, you must pay the other side for their legal fees and trouble. As far as the insanity defense goes, the Party recommends that “not guilty by reason of insanity” be changed to “guilty, but insane.” By this verdict, the person is determined to have committed the act, and punishment/confinement is based on the mental state. This will get rid of the ridiculousness of someone getting off with a few months in a counseling center and no criminal record if they commit a major crime in front of 23 witnesses and 2 video cameras on the corner of Main and Commerce at high noon on Wednesday because they claim to be “schizo-bananas.” The concept of “personal responsibility” shall be included in all legal transactions. Each person is responsible for their own actions, and cannot use society, PTSD, social deprivation, slave status of a great-great-great-great grandparent, etc., as a defense for non-social or anti-social actions, unless that person can show, without a doubt, that his situation is unique, and why others, who overcame similar situations, were aberrations. The designation of “hate crime” is to be removed from the books. Thought is not a chargeable offense. This designation only serves to foster a victim-oppressor relationship as hate crimes have been defined as committed only by (white) (male) (straight) against (non-white) (female) (homosexual) (specifically designated minority group). All crimes of violence should be thought of the same, and the amount of hate in the perpetrator is the same no matter the status of the victim. Lawyers, as officers of the court, are to be reminded that the release of a guilty person is, to society, as great a miscarriage of justice as the conviction of an innocent one, and they shall be held equally culpable for both. There shall be no “sealing” or “closing” of a police or criminal record when a juvenile offender reaches the age of maturity. A person’s criminal record is their criminal record no matter the age, since you can’t change the past.
Honesty in Governmental Votes: It has become a practice among some in Congress and the Senate to have their vote changed in the record if that vote was not vital to the passing or defeat of the bill. This is done so the member’s official voting record can be changed to reflect a different stance on a controversial vote in order to please certain constituents. If a member casts a vote, that is it!
The Second Amendment: The right to keep and bear arms is vital to this nation. Not only are all citizens under the age of 45 automatically part of the militia, according to US Federal Code, but our Party believes in the old saying, “An armed man is a citizen, and an unarmed man is a subject.” The Second Amendment makes it clear that this is an individual right not to be violated. Citizens have the right to firearms for self-defense, hunting, militia duties, and to make sure our government never turns tyrannical nor do the socialists throw out the Constitution. Any jurisdiction that has any kind of gun ban (hand gun bans in DC and Chicago are eminent examples) is in violation of the Constitution.
Taking Care of Those Who Are Disabled: The ending of entitlement programs would only be for those people who are functional and can work. People who are physically or mentally disabled to the point where they cannot do a job will be taken care of. THAT is the only type of handout that the American taxpayer never has a problem with. We will work with charitable organizations to make sure disabled Americans have food, shelter, and the care they need. People with disabilities that don’t quite meet that mark, but that are severely impairing, will get partial assistance, but not if that impairment is from their own actions, such as alcohol or drug use. This is as close as our Party will get to George W. Bush’s “compassionate conservative” label.
A Constitutional Amendment to Fix the 14th Amendment: Section 1 of the 14th Amendment begins, “Section 1. All persons born or naturalized in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States and of the State wherein they reside.” This is the clause that has given us the term “anchor baby” in reference to illegal aliens who cross the border and pop out a baby, in an American hospital paid for by American taxpayers, and the child automatically becomes a US citizen and cannot be kicked out of the country. The parents cannot be kicked out either, as they cannot leave the baby behind. This must end. The Party proposes a new Constitutional Amendment that will clearly state that automatic citizenship shall only be conferred upon a baby that is born in the USA to parents who are in this nation LEGALLY!
